Taming toddler tantrums: advice to help both you and your little one cope!
No-one wants to deal with tantrums, but they are sometimes unavoidable. Here’s how to deal with toddler tantrums.
We’ve all been there: you’re in the middle of the grocery store, calmly doing your weekly shop, when all of a sudden your toddler has a complete meltdown, seemingly out of nowhere complete with an arching back, kicking and screaming, flailing about on the floor.
Rest assured that this is common behaviour for young children between the ages of one and three years old. A toddler’s social and emotional skills aren’t fully developed yet, so it’s difficult for them to articulate and deal with big emotions.
It’s also at this age that young children begin to experiment with their newfound independence by trying to control their environment. “As your toddler develops their own personality, they will try to assert themself – and when they don't get their way, they may throw themself on the floor in order to get a response out of you,” says Meg Faure, author, occupational therapist, and renowned childcare expert.
How to cope with toddler tantrums
Firstly, check that your toddler isn’t tired or hungry. “An overtired child is a recipe for a temper tantrum,” says Faure. “Toddlers are sponges for information, and without regular naps and good quality sleep at night, they become susceptible to overstimulation.”
Avoid going shopping before lunch or nap time, and make sure that you’ve got plenty of snacks and a drink on hand to offer your child while out and about.
Try the A-B-C approach
Young children don’t have the skills or vocabulary to properly express their wants and needs, which means that they tend to vent their frustration by kicking, screaming, and even hitting.
This can be incredibly frustrating for you as a parent, but it’s important to remain calm and avoid arguing with a hysterical toddler. Instead, Faure recommends trying the A-B-C approach:
A – Acknowledge your child’s needs. “Tell your toddler that you understand her,” says Faure. For example, try saying ‘I know you want to play with your brother’s Lego.”
B – Set clear Boundaries. Try saying ‘But you may not play with small Lego pieces.’
C – Offer your toddler a Choice. For example, ‘You can play with your Duplo instead.’
Most importantly, remember that you’re the adult, so avoid negotiating or arguing with your toddler while they’re in the midst a tantrum.
“When your child throws themself on the floor in anger, try not to respond – neither positively (with a hug or concern, for example) or negatively (with anger),” advises Faure. Simply say, ‘OK, you want to be on the floor – stay there,’ then step over them and do something else in the room.
Your toddler will soon calm down and look for a more effective way to communicate their needs.
IMAGE CREDIT: 123rf.com
