A balanced view
Wellness, in its entirety, is about achieving a harmonious balance in our daily lives, allowing us to not just survive but thrive.
“Therefore, when we have discussions about sexual wellbeing, we embrace the holistic approach that encompasses all dimensions of our health, including our sexuality,” says Dr Mpume Zenda aka Dr Gyae, an Obstetrician - Gynaecologist and Sexologist.
In the realm of sexual wellbeing, our emotional and mental state plays a vital role. Here Dr Zenda explores these components:
Self-awareness
“Recognising our innate sexuality and embracing it is the first step. A positive self-image and body perception are essential for feeling good about ourselves and confidently pursuing pleasure. Remember, our mental wellbeing is paramount – after all, the brain is the largest sex organ.”
Emotional connectedness
“As emotional beings, we crave connection. Emotional bonds surpass the physical act of sex. When we feel emotionally connected, we experience a sense of belonging, being seen, and the ability to be vulnerable.”
Sexual justice
“Sexual wellness thrives in an environment where we uphold our values and protect our rights.”
Pleasure and satisfaction
“Understanding what brings us sexual pleasure and respectfully communicating it to our partners empowers us. Instead of relying on someone else, we take ownership of our own satisfaction.”
Dispelling sexual wellness myths
Sexual wellness is an integral part of our overall health and happiness, yet it is often clouded by myths and misinformation. Let's debunk some of these myths and highlight the facts:
Myth: Hormonal imbalances only occur during menopause.
Fact: Hormonal imbalances can happen at any age and stage of a woman's life. While menopause is a significant hormonal transition, fluctuations in hormone levels can occur during puberty, pregnancy, postpartum, perimenopause, and even due to certain medical conditions or lifestyle factors
Myth: The morning after pill is a reliable contraception
Fact: Emergency contraception, aka the "morning-after pill," is a valuable option for preventing unintended pregnancies when regular contraception fails or is not used. It is not intended for ongoing or frequent use. If you find yourself needing emergency contraception frequently, it is essential to reassess your contraception plan and consider a reliable, long-term contraceptive method that suits your needs.
Myth: I only need to get screened if something doesn’t quite feel right
Fact: Understanding our bodies' natural changes and phases is crucial. Regular check-ups and screenings help ensure our bodies function properly. The key screenings include regular gynae visits, HPV vaccination, Pap Smears, and screenings for sexually transmitted infections (STIs) like chlamydia, gonorrhoea, syphilis, and HIV.
Myth: As a man, having a vasectomy will kill your sex drive and performance in bed
Fact: A vasectomy is one of the most reliable forms of contraception with a >99% efficacy. It does not interfere with the production of male hormone testosterone, and therefore should not decrease sex drive, or affect your ability to have an erection or ejaculate.
Myth: If there is no penetrative intercourse, then there is no risk of passing on sexually transmitted infections.
Fact: STIs can be transmitted during any sexual activity that involves the following: the mouth, or saliva, blood, breast milk, vaginal fluid, pre-ejaculation (pre-cum), semen, or anal secretions. This means STIs can be transmitted during any of the following sex acts: kissing, oral nipple stimulation, oral sex and any play involving menstrual blood or blood from another part of the body. The best way to protect yourself is to know your status as well as your partner’s, use necessary barriers (condoms, dental dams) and regular screening.
Myth: It is our partner’s responsibility to give us sexual pleasure
Fact: Sexual pleasure and satisfaction is first and foremost ours to own and enjoy. Our own attitudes play a significant role in how we show up in the bedroom. Knowing what we like, and initiating and advocating for our sexual pleasure is key to having pleasurable, fulfilling intimacy.
Myth: I cannot fall pregnant if I have intercourse during a menstrual period
Fact: While it is unlikely, the reality is that it is possible, with a 2% probability according to research. Factors that increase this probability include irregular periods, short menstrual cycles, spotting, or a period that lasts longer (beyond 7 days) and can carry over into your fertile period.
“A healthy and informed sexual life has transformative effects,” says Dr Zenda. “It boosts our self-esteem and confidence, enhances our relationships, and empowers us to make informed choices regarding our sexual health. It equips us with the knowledge and tools to protect ourselves from unplanned pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. By nurturing our emotional and mental wellbeing, embracing pleasure, and advocating for sexual justice, we can cultivate a fulfilling and empowered sexual life.”
IMAGE CREDIT: 123rf.com